Tristan is a 15-year-old boy with a gift for drawing, a brilliant mind and a tender heart that he shows to those he trusts through big hugs and kisses. But before he came to Connections, these strengths weren’t visible. He barely spoke, and his autism-related behaviors were so extreme that his family struggled with even basic tasks like going to the grocery store, where he was prone to throwing disruptive fits or dangerously running away.
Finding the Right Fit
Tristan attended a specialty school for children with autism in his early years. He usually got low grades and wasn’t progressing academically or mastering essential skills like communication, socialization or self-regulation. His mom Erica says that by the end of elementary school, he spoke 10-20 words total and that his attempted sentences had no structure. “When my son was in 5th grade, I had a moment when I just cried,” recalls Erica. “The homework he came home with was a Kindergarten-level worksheet. It was heartbreaking. I knew he could do more and was not OK with an approach that didn’t help him move forward.”
A friend recommended Connections, Erica toured, and she liked what she saw. Tristan made the move in middle school.
“The Connections teachers and staff have really impacted Tristan. They’re phenomenal. At Connections, you’re not a number, you’re considered a family member. It’s a dream come true that Tristan found this school.” — Erica, Tristan's Mom
A Big Decision Leads to Big Improvements
When Tristan started at Connections, he was a sweet student but had some challenging behaviors, according to Ms. Tammy, his current teacher. She says that he frequently had disruptive and even unsafe tantrums and didn’t know how to express himself.
She and the Connections team could tell that they needed to gain Tristan’s trust before he would accept their instruction. “It’s all about trust with Tristan. We had to take the time to build that bond,” she explains.
Looking for the root cause of his disruptive behavior, the Connections team observed that Tristan struggled with anxiety. “We could tell that Tristan was worried about what he was expected to do next, and transitioning from one activity to another made him feel unsafe,” says Ms. Tammy. “Unexpected fire drills were particularly problematic. I noticed that any room he was in or had been in during a fire drill, he didn’t want to ever return to that room.”
With that understanding, she and her team developed a visual schedule to show Tristan what he would be doing throughout the day. “The schedule helps reduce his anxiety and helps him mentally prepare for the next activity,” Ms. Tammy adds. “We’re also teaching him healthy ways to handle anxious thoughts. For example, he loves to draw so we have large post-it pads on the walls of the classroom where he’s allowed to go draw if he needs to feel calm.”
The team also gave him a behavior chart to let him know what’s expected of him. Ms. Tammy adds, “I’m teaching him steps he can take when he’s feeling anxious and helping him learn to pause and think before reacting to unexpected or new circumstances.”
Ms. Tammy sets a positive tone in her classroom each day with a cheerful greeting that also invites students to let her know how they’re feeling that day. Each morning, she asks each student to finish this sentence: “Today’s going to be a … .” She says, “Sometimes Tristan will answer ‘a great day’ and I know he’s feeling good. Sometimes he’ll answer ‘a weird day’ and that lets me know that he may need more support that day.”
Leaps and Bounds of Progress
At Connections, Tristan has thrived, rising to the increasingly higher expectations his teachers and therapists have set for him. “Tristan is a different person now,” says Erica. “He has made leaps and bounds!”
Tristan now speaks in complete sentences and has developed what his mom calls a “colorful vocabulary.” He’s also becoming more independent, handling chores around the house like washing clothes, taking out the trash, sweeping and making his bed — without being asked.
Socially, Tristan has also made great strides. He enjoys helping teachers and staff at Connections with various tasks and looks out for his classmates. “Tristan is so considerate. When we go to Publix, he frequently asks if we can get a special treat for his classmates,” Erica adds.
Academically, Tristan’s progress is equally impressive, and his gift for art has flourished. “He loves to draw and is extremely gifted at creating cartoons and making videos,” Erica explains. Tristan doesn’t just draw characters; he creates entire scenes and skits, often discussing his dreams of producing content for Nickelodeon Jr.
“The Connections teachers and staff have really impacted Tristan. They’re phenomenal,” Erica says. “At Connections, you’re not a number, you’re considered a family member. It’s a dream come true that Tristan found this school.”
Erica says the positive influence of male role models at Connections has also been important for her son. “Tristan’s father is not involved in his life, and I’m a single mom. Having that male presence at Connections with Jason and Trevor and others makes such a tremendous difference. They speak life into Tristan and step up for my son,” says Erica. “The day of prom, I saw a picture of Jason helping my son with his tie. It was so touching that Jason would help my son that way and let him enjoy prom.”
A Bright Future
Looking forward, Erica and the Connections team envision a bright future for Tristan. Erica sees him possibly working at Connections, volunteering or even assisting teachers. Or perhaps he’ll pursue his passion for drawing and animation through a career in computer animation, cartoons or graphic design.
Ms. Tammy shares Erica’s optimism. “Tristan is very bright. I want him to go out into the world knowing he’s safe and that he can be himself,” says Ms. Tammy. She and the Connections team are helping him build a wide range of skills, including those needed for job interviews, so that he can work and create a wonderful life.
Ms. Tammy adds, “Tristan is my little blessing. I want to see him and all my students grow every day.”
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